Why Not School?

People often ask me why we homeschool.
Some think it’s because I want to shelter my kids.
Some assume it’s because I think the schools are terrible or teachers aren’t good enough for my children.

Those guesses are not entirely wrong but not for the reasons you’d think.

When our first was born, full-day every-day Junior Kindergarten had just come into effect. It used to be that children who were aged 3-4 (turning four by the end of calendar year) had the option to attend school every second day and every half day on Fridays. It was free child care but also a great head start for those who wouldn’t get it otherwise. For the children who don’t have an enriching home life, it was really a great thing to offer for them as the preschool years of 3-4 are a great window of developmental growth emotionally, cognitively and physically. Not all parents can make the most of this stage and so Junior Kindergarten filled that void for their children.

Then they changed the program to full-day every-day, with one teacher and one Early Childhood Educator in each classroom. I’m not entirely sure of the reasoning behind it but as an Early Childhood Educator myself, the idea of my 3 or 4 year old child going on a bus and being in schools with kids in grades 5 and 6, or even grade 12… it just didn’t feel right. So we decided not to use the program. This was when The Tank was just brand new in 2012.

Then I met a homeschooling mom who was also a military spouse who said “I’m really surprised more military families don’t homeschool” and that stuck with me. So I did a little research and the more I learned about homeschooling, and unschooling specifically, the more it made sense to me. Allowing kids to learn at their own pace, allowing them to learn about things as they become interested in them, just made sense to me. I thought about how much I remembered from school, and how much of what I learned in school is relevant in my every day life… I don’t know about you but for me, it’s not very much.
In fact, I took French all throughout school, even though it was optional, and yet in the four years we lived in Quebec, I was often told to just speak English and was even laughed at when I tried speaking French. But that’s a story for another day.
What I learned in post secondary school sunk in because I had learned about things I was interested it. Why shouldn’t all education be like that?

Learning about suspension bridges

I know, some people will say “We learn these things because we have to!” But WHY do we have to? Really? Why do we have to learn about about things that have no relevance in our daily lives? Some things we have to learn, yes, like reading and adding, budgeting, taxes, etc. But do we really need to learn what the capital city of each province is? When we have phones and the internet at our fingertips (or Alexa or Google home), why do we need to be taught these things? I don’t think we do. I think if we want to learn about something, in this era of technology literally everywhere we turn, we can learn about it any time. It doesn’t need to be age or grade specific. Homeschooling is not like it was even 20 years ago. The ability to learn about anything you want is at our disposal with the internet.

That’s when we decided to homeschool.
Then other things fell into place:

• When Daddy is away for work, we could go *home* to Nova Scotia and visit family. Or we could travel and explore. And when Daddy gets back, we can spend time with him without worrying about missing school or falling behind. We can just focus on reconnecting and bonding with him. We can go on family vacations whenever he has time off, regardless of the school schedule.
• We can find learning everywhere in everything we do. We can go to museums during the weekdays when it’s not crowded and busy and just do our own thing, or zoos, or parks and libraries.
• My children will spend more time together. They will form closer bonds and relationships, they will be connected in ways other siblings won’t. Yes, they fight and they bicker, but they also take care of each other and look out for each other. And wherever we move, and whatever we do, they will be one of the most constant things in each others lives. They also get more time with their parents than they would if we both worked or if they were in school. I know it’s not something everyone can do, and it’s not something everyone would even want to try, but it works for us.
• They won’t be exposed to bullying quite as much as if they were in school. We still do many things with other kids, both socially and with programs, and interact with people of all ages every time we leave the house, so they are still socialized and are very, very social. Sometimes even too social. But yes, sheltered a bit, I suppose. I have to admit, I do love that they don’t know what certain fads are, or social media is, or what everyone wants for Christmas. And I was sad when my son decided one day that he only wanted to wear his pink snow gloves around home, not around other kids, because he didn’t want them to see. Luckily he was 8 before that self-consciousness of what his peers thought started, but I’m not sorry he was sheltered from the pressure to fit in a little longer than most.
• And then there’s the curriculum, or life learning. When it’s done at home, it will be consistent no matter where we live. Did you know that curriculum differs between provinces? It even differs between school boards within the same province. So a child in grade 2 in Petawawa, Ontario will be posted to St Jean, Quebec, go into grade 2 (or grade 1 depending on their birthday) and be completely lost. Either they will be ahead of their peers or behind. And when they are behind, who picks up the slack for them? Will they get the support they need to catch up, or will they be perpetually behind until they move to another province or school board? Then, they move again, and again they will be ahead or behind.

Which brings me to the idea that I homeschool because I don’t think the system is good enough. Which isn’t entirely wrong, but not exactly right either. There are currently education strikes here in Ontario. Teacher unions are striking 1-2 days every week because of the budget cuts in the school system. The educators want more support in their classrooms, and less students in their classrooms. There are currently and average of 30-35 students per class, and half of those students have either behavioural issues or learning issues or both. One teacher cannot safely and adequately teach the same material to all of these students each day without constant interruption, or pausing to help those who need it, or even evacuating the classroom because a student is being violent.
When people think that I chose to homeschool because I think I know more than teachers, they’re wrong. I think teachers are incredible and amazing. I was on track to become a teacher myself at one point in my life, and I have more teacher friends than I can even name. I have nothing but respect and admiration for teachers and I wish they could just go to work and do what they love to do: teach children, inspire children to want to learn, and be a safe place for them if they don’t have another. But the school system is not set up for that right now. Instead of teaching and inspiring and being a safe place, teachers are spending their days mediating, protecting, and handling one on one needs. Students are getting lost, at no fault of the teachers, in a system that is not putting them first.

I don’t homeschool because I don’t trust the teachers to educate my children, I homeschool because I don’t NEED to rely on teachers to educate my children. Quite frankly, teachers have enough on their plates, if I can alleviate some of that stress and pressure by keeping just three kids out the their classrooms, why wouldn’t I? It’s not the main reason I homeschool but it’s a valid one, I think.

I am grateful that I have the ability to stay home with my children. To see them all day, every day (even the days that make my hair turn the beautiful silver it’s becoming, or the days I unfortunately scream in frustration). I complain about not having a break but I also love that I don’t miss a thing. It’s complicated, this parenthood thing.

Sometimes we do bookwork…

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